The Do’s and Don’ts of Making the First Phone Call to a Woman You’re Dating
The Do’s and Don’ts of Making the First Phone Call
So, you just went out on a fabulous date with a beautiful woman, dropped her off at her place and then giggled your entire drive home. Now what? You feel like calling her right away to make sure she got into her house safely, but that would be kinda weird, right?
Yep, that would be weird. You’ll make the gal think that you’re desperate, so you need to wait a while before you call or text her. But you’re probably wondering how long… a week? One day? Three days? Don’t fret. This list of do’s and don’ts will ensure that your phone call is timed just right and packs the punch necessary to help you score that coveted second date.
DO:
Wait two days to call. Two days is enough time to make you look like you actually have a life without keeping the girl waiting so long that she’ll give up on you because she assumes that you’re not interested.
Call with a purpose. Make sure you have a specific reason for calling. That’ll eliminate all of your awkward stuttering and make the phone call run smoothly. Generally, the best reason to call is to set up a meeting.
Keep it short and sweet. You don’t want to blab on because you’ll bore the girl or turn her off. Make a little small talk and set up a meeting. No fluff. Think 5-10 minutes, max. You want to come across as busy and mysterious, not lonely and clingy.
Smile while you talk. Not only will it make you feel a bit more relaxed, it will also come across in your voice as you speak.
Be direct. Don’t beat around the bush, umming and ahhhing throughout your phone call. Go straight for the jugular by asking for the date. Women love men who are direct and confident.
DON’T:
Don’t fear rejection. Tell the girl when you want to see her clearly, directly, and concisely. Don’t say, “Let’s meet at Starbucks at 6pm, if you have time,” or “I don’t know if you’re available, but maybe we can meet at Starbucks at 6pm.” Say, “Meet me at Starbucks at 6pm.” Period.
Don’t leave more than one message. If you call your date and she’s not there, don’t leave several messages. If she’s interested, she’ll call you back after hearing your first one.
Don’t blindly follow dating rules. Some dating “systems” may recommend that you call a girl exactly one week after your first date, but if your date is calling you a few days before that, don’t hesitate to call her back! You may be breaking the rules of some system, but every situation is different and calls for a unique approach. Don’t let a dating guru’s system or book rule over your every action.
Don’t let the girl end the call. Make sure that you’re the one who ends the call to keep that mysterious aura going. Have an excuse ready to make it easier for you to end the call. For example, you could say that you have an appointment or that you need to take a shower because you just got back from the gym.
Don’t open up too much. Keep the focus of the conversation on her. Ask her open-ended questions about how her day was or about her job and listen carefully to her answers so you can ask her more questions.
Don’t wait by your phone for her to call back. Pursue your interests and enjoy life in the meantime. Stay busy and let things run their course naturally.
loading...
loading...
Related posts:
October 13th, 2010 at 8:39 am
Are we playing in the coy pond?
Waiting the proverbial ‘two days’ is too restrained and constrained.
Carpe diem.
October 13th, 2010 at 8:50 am
My 35 year old guy friend is sitting next to me right now. His response to your comment is as follows:
“How I wish there were more women like you in this world”.
I concur. But at the end of the day, it’s always a matter of “Call too soon, seem like you’re desperate”.