In this day and age of online dating, it is far too
common to meet someone online, send a few
emails back and forth, meet up for coffee and
then never talk to that person ever again.
From the women that I have spoken to, at least
1 out of every 3 dates they go out on result in
the guy not calling them back for a second date.
Why is this? If this has happened to you, you
might find yourself scratching your head thinking back…..
“The email exchange seemed normal”….
“When we spoke on the phone, he seemed interested”….
“When we met up for coffee, the conversation seemed to be there”….
Most guys are quick to make snap judgments about
women, especially when it comes to online dating. If the
guy thinks that there is even one small thing amiss, he
would simply not call you back and move onto the next
girl. Why is this? Well, let’s face it; if you lived in a small
cow town in the Midwest with a population of only 100
people, chances are the guys would take what they could
get. But when it comes to online dating, and the hundreds
of potential dates that guys could have…..why should they give
you a second chance?
I recently polled over 50 guys and asked them to give me
10 types of women that they avoid like the plague. Now,
YOU may not consider yourself to be one of these “types”,
but the guy certainly did….
p.s. If any of these apply to you, scroll down to the
bottom of the article for a quick and easy way to figure
out “why wasn’t that one guy interested in me?”.
1. Cindy Chatterbox
Cindy Chatterbox is the type of girl that just won’t shut her
“Blah blah blah my job, blah blah blah my cat, blah blah
blah purple monkey elevator.” is what a guy hears when
he is talking to little little Cindy-Lou.
“Does this women ever shut up?”
It is one thing to tell a semi-long winded story, but when
you just dominate the conversation it gets old, fast.
Nothing turns a guy on more than a woman that flirts.
Nothing turns a guy off more than a woman who flirts.
Guys like it when you flirt with them. But if they perceive
you as a flirt, then it’s pretty much all over. Keep it to
a bare minimum, lest you risk being labeled as a chronic
Unless they are out for sex, guys hate women that come
off as desperate. Generally speaking, this really doesn’t
apply to most women under the age of 35-ish. You may
fall into this category and not realize it…..just like men,
women give off subconscious signals. Men are quick
to pick up on them and it just turns them off. If you are
35 years of age or older, ask youself the following question:
“Am I looking to quickly get into a relationship so I
won’t feel lonely anymore?”
/Discuss amongst yourselves
4. The Cat Lady.
Every guy in their life has had the (dis)pleasure of going
on a date with the Cat Lady. Cat Ladies are generally
mildly neurotic and sometimes have wild mood swings.
They tend to be all over the place during the course of
normal conversation and by most guys standards, are
easy to get into bed…..it’s getting them out that is the
Clingy women tend to be a bit…..clingy. They have
the unique ability to change their exact physical shape so it
fits perfectly in the shadow that the guy casts when
he walks down the street on a bright sunny day. They
tend to call too much…..they tend to write long-winded
emails, when a few words would suffice. In fact, after
a guy decides to not pursue a relationship with a woman
he deems as “clingy” she tends to show him just how
mistaken his is……most notably by carving her name into
the side of his car and leaving a 5×10 glossy photo of
herself (complete with hair clippings) on the doorstep
of his house.
6. The Judgmental bitch
Every woman has the right to express her opinion…..
just like every guy has the right to not call the girl back
after the first date. How to avoid being (mis?)labeled
as a judgmental bitch? Simple. If you have to express
a negative opinion about something a guys likes or talks
about, don’t go overboard. Just say that you don’t like
it and give a short explanation as to why.
7. Hoodrat, Hoodrat, Hoochie-Momma !!
There are many ways a guy could plausibly label a girl
as a hoochie momma. The way she dresses, the way she
talks, the way she acts. One or two little things combined
shouldn’t cause a guy to turn tail and run…..but when you
show up to the first date in shirt that shows off your boobs,
talk about your “special talents” in bed and then proceed to
demonstrate said talents in the bathroom at Denny’s…..
Chances are, you might be a hoochie momma. Best thing
to do is head off to Sears or Target to buy some respectable
clothing, and try not to have intercourse along the way?
8. Girls with guy friends. LOTS of guy friends.
For some reason, most guys don’t like it when a girl
has a lot of guy friends. Be it jealousy or whatever else,
it can turn a good portion of the general male online
dating population off. If you do have a lot of guy friends,
try to play it down a notch or two.
9. PaRtY ChIcKs !
What guy doesn’t love a fun, outgoing girl? It’s just when
it is a 24/7 type of ordeal, it can get old, quick. Guys don’t
see party chicks are potential relationship partners. So don’t
give off the impression that life to you is one big party (even if
10. Subservient Slaves
Unless you are a member of the newest online dating site called:
“Barefoot and Pregnant in the Kitchen Singles”, chances are they
guy you are out on a date with does NOT like women that are
subservient. Just because the guy is “hot” and whatever else,
does not mean that you have to bow down to his every whim
and agree with every statement that he makes. Once you do
so, the challenge is gone and the guys attention is quickly drawn
to the other girl who is playing hard to get. There is a fine line
to walk between coming off as a judgmental bitch and/or coming
off as a spineless wimp.
So after reading all of these “types”, are you getting a bit
paranoid now? Especially since in no way/shape or form
do you consider yourself to have even the slightest iota
of any of those traits? Sometimes we see ourselves
differently than other people see us.
A great way to figure out if you come off that way is to
simply ask a friend or family member to constructively
criticize you. Be forewarned that even your closest
friends and family members may sugar coat the truth
as to how they see you. A great way to get an honest,
unbaised look at how others view you is to take the
The personality profile is a free tool that many
people use to gain a better understanding of how
others view themselves. You are asked a series
of questions, in which you are expected to answer
as honestly as you can. eHarmony then takes your
answers and analyzes them using their scientifically
based system and gives you a 5-6 page analysis
of your personality and how others view you. You can
then print it out for future reference.
eHarmony spends tens of thousands of dollars every
year in academic research and they use their findings
to continuously improve their personality profile system.
Take advantage of it and you might find yourself looking
at a totally different person than you see in the mirror….